Hi I’m Nathan (Nate for short) and I’m a gay seventeen-year-old. I’m posting this story as a type of precaution, awareness and hope to all the homosexuals out their like me. Well, where to start… at the beginning seems like the best place.
I first discovered my sexuality in Year 6 when I was about 12 years old. For the next four years I battled with the feeling that I didn’t belong or that I would never find happiness in my life. On top of that I was severely physically, mentally and cyber-bullied and because of this I succumbed to a deep depression where I withdrew into myself and I felt as if there was no hope or happiness waiting for me. My depression was so bad that I made an attempt on my life. Thank goodness that I was interrupted in the process. Every day I am extremely grateful for that interruption, because if I did suicide I would have missed out on so much happiness and joy that was to come.
It wasn’t until a few months ago that I told my family that I was gay and once I found out that I had their full support I started accepting and appreciating who I am. Now every time I get up in the morning I feel accepted because I now know that I belong. During my depression I made one of the biggest mistakes anyone suffering from depression could…I went through it alone! Please a note to anybody who is reading this and is suffering from depression: DO NOT GO THROUGH IT ALONE!! Talk to a school counsellor, a school friend or even a family member. Ring the help lines available because the people on the other line aren’t just there because they are paid to, they are there because they have experienced what you are going through. Believe me; you feel much better when you talk to someone about how you’re feeling.
About six months after I came out to my family I decided to come out to my fellow year twelves. To me, coming out is only necessary to family and friends because it wasn’t anyone else’s business to know. However, I started thinking to myself and if a year twelve had come out in school while I was in school with them then a lot of things would have been so much easier. So I took the opportunity to tell my year twelves about my sexuality in an oral presentation. I had to present my oral in my last lesson so my stomach was pretty much churning ALL DAY :P. When the time had come to present my oral my heart was in my throat, my legs were like jelly and I could literally hear my heart thumping. Nevertheless, I faced my fellow classmates and I read my oral. In my oral I stated ‘I am not revealing my sexuality to seek attention, I am revealing my sexuality to become an advocate, a role-model, a leader for other teenagers struggling with their sexuality or have a lack of support within their school.’ It was a relief to hear the applause at the end of my presentation and the support I received afterwards was overwhelming. Support is out there, you just need to find it, to seek it out.
We only have one chance at life and why should we have to live it in misery?? You are all beautiful and unique youths and deserve the best life can give!! It may seem that there is no light at the end of the tunnel but believe me when I say ‘It Gets Better!’Be Gay and Be Proud of who you are because I know I am and I wouldn’t change it for the world!